How little repentance there is in the world,
and how many sins I have to repent of!
I am troubled for my sin of passion,
for the shame and horror of it as an evil;
I purpose to give way to it no more,
and come to thee for strength to that end.
Most men give vent to anger frequently
and are overcome by it,
bringing many excuses and extenuations for it,
as that it occurs suddenly,
that they delight not in it,
that they are sorry afterwards,
that godly men commit it.
They thus seek peace after outbursts of passion
by entire forgetfulness of it,
or, by skinning over their wound,
they hope for healing
without peace in Christ’s blood.
Lord God, I know that my sudden anger arises
when things cross me,
and I desire to please only myself, not Christ;
There is in all wrongs and crosses a double cross —
that which crosses me,
and that which crosses thee;
In all good things there is
somewhat that pleases me,
somewhat that pleases thee;
My sin is that my heart is pleased or troubled
as things please or trouble me,
without my having a regard to Christ;
Thus, I am like Eli,
the subject of punishment for not rebuking sin;
whereas I should humbly confess my sin
and fly to the blood of Christ for pardon
Give me, then, repentance, true brokenness,
for these things thou wilt not despise
in spite of my sin.
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